Have I seen any "challenger" expressing he was looking forward to play somewhere and using a devil emoji? LOL. I guess it's not only the listening fans who go to those places thinking about "sex", the players too. It was clear to me I was not fighting for a wholehearted angel and the kind of devil that keeps the same Division I keep. Every time she used her favorite song, I knew she could only be thinking about "life", and if she was thinking about any boy, it certainly wasn't me. You see? It's not the same Balance I seek. So why keep fighting for someone who prioritized her "self" and was unempathetic? Because there was a sign. Since I'm a very Willful boy, I knew that, meanwhile, that was the trail to be on to get Her and keep charging my mind.
If the "loser" who had no "thing" to give had dumped her like the world does, would it hurt? When the other is drunk in "love" and it hurts, why do people still don't change? Because they are hit in the ego. The Way it happened, her asleep self was shaken and even without searching for Truth she could feel that when she was despising me she was despising herself. I'm not sure if it was enough for her to awake though. I knew what was going on from the start, and it was no Life. So no Good could come out of this, and before I could win the race in the unholy course I was never on, to be with a person who would have no Thing to give, the Teacher would level with me and tell me She had decided to use Her secrets.
I think she was unable to keep hiding the secret secondary "party" in her balance in a point where she was about to come ask me to join her in the "dream". So, as soon as I got alerted, I started performing the search in the system and found the evidences of the foolish game, and you know that "lovers" can't play following the Monkey rule. Without access to my emails one is unable to know what those posts of hers mean, and without reading my posts it's hard to suspect what that tracklist means. To be sure you'd still need a little of psychological knowledge. So what direction was she going: reverse or forward? She was probably anxious to play at Ultra Miami too, but was only more careful to hide her "personal" search on the "social" network.
This guy knows how the system and its mechanics "work", so that expression with that emoji made him question, "What crush is the fan thinking about?". Even if I had seen it earlier, I'd have stayed in deep Calm, because I knew if I were dealing with a real woman, his "hope" would be vain and bound, limited, tied to him "self" only, that is, he would be totally unable to change her Course. But he knew he had all "reason" to believe that his vanity could be materialized. Because the "game" was not over and she was hesitant to play the Game, she was still choosing to play it "safe" and be a "normal" person, an empty and deceived citizen of the no Good ship, while probably listening to "friends" advising her to stay away from me, because I was crazy.
Who cares if she's not swedish? All I wanted to know was if she was willing to leave behind the fallen earth to be in One, learn another Language and become someone you can trust. She seemed to be content with her "job" and not so uncomfortable with what she saw within her, in "society" and in nature. In one interview she talked about her being a perfectionist with a clear vision of what she wanted, and in another about pride and self-confidence to go ahead. You see? That's division. You can't return to the Water with a heart and a speech like that. Even if she were the most talented musician ever, what would that mean? So I kept waiting for the "business" woman to want the Same as I, what did not happen, and the meeting on the other Side was cancelled.
It's so sad when you see people who were supposed to talk about moving on from that nonsense vain way and seeking Truth to experience Life, "encouraging" others to go on, to believe there's something "better" to be found ahead. And when you're still a fool who has never known the Difference to be able to compare one "thing" with the Other, you must even think the enemy is a friend wishing for you to be really happy. That's why it has been said that those people you meet at temples are a part of the system. In most cases, they indeed are. You rarely happen to find a crazy person sharing crazy things there, or anyone else interested in them and looking to have an odd conversation. They are as busy as the rest of the world, secretly indulging the same "faith" which believes the matter they see to be more "real" than the Word who created it.
Welcome to the jungle low.
Even when in "church", you're all alone there.
